Friday, April 10, 2009
Tears of fury
Let down.
What's wrng wif me ? Had been really emotional these past few days. Brooding over stuff, getting stressed&depressed over stuff, & irritated over a slightest thing. Often, I find tears welling up within my eyes involuntarily. I hate this feeling. Really. The same thing happened t me yesterday again, before dozing off, my mind was rather preoccupied & I really feel like draining all my tears out. How I wish there's someone whom I can really pour out what I'm thinking.
Slept for arnd 14 hours, but when I was having tuition, I felt that my brain couldn't function well. It just felt so tired. As my teacher taught, I couldn't do anything but just stare at the paper blankly, & her words just came in & out from my ears. Then I'll go "Huh?" . I tried to read the question. But the effort is futile. I just can't seem to grasp what the question wants. Everything just doesn't make sense.
Attempting one simple question of Trigo-Bearings, I took around 10 minutes to solve it? & The answer was wrg due to my carelessness.
I had more than enough sleep. But why was my brain still so tired? It's tired to study. But if I think about stuff, it's not tired.
......
I ain't going out anymore. I'm not gonna prawn today.
Initially, I was really looking forward to going to prawn. I really missed it much.
But upon recieving one sms, my mood took the toll.
Yeahyeah, they eat. I dont eat. Told my maid not to cook for me. Why? Cos I wanted to go out with u all. Then? ....
And yep, wasn't long till tears welled up again. Fuck.
This time, I didn't bother to control it.
I don't want to listen to the small voice in my mind/heart anymore, that says: I must understand. I must understand. I must understand.
Because. I. Cant. Take. It. Anymore.
I MUST UNDERSTAND
What's wrng wif me ? Had been really emotional these past few days. Brooding over stuff, getting stressed&depressed over stuff, & irritated over a slightest thing. Often, I find tears welling up within my eyes involuntarily. I hate this feeling. Really. The same thing happened t me yesterday again, before dozing off, my mind was rather preoccupied & I really feel like draining all my tears out. How I wish there's someone whom I can really pour out what I'm thinking.
Slept for arnd 14 hours, but when I was having tuition, I felt that my brain couldn't function well. It just felt so tired. As my teacher taught, I couldn't do anything but just stare at the paper blankly, & her words just came in & out from my ears. Then I'll go "Huh?" . I tried to read the question. But the effort is futile. I just can't seem to grasp what the question wants. Everything just doesn't make sense.
Attempting one simple question of Trigo-Bearings, I took around 10 minutes to solve it? & The answer was wrg due to my carelessness.
I had more than enough sleep. But why was my brain still so tired? It's tired to study. But if I think about stuff, it's not tired.
......
I ain't going out anymore. I'm not gonna prawn today.
Initially, I was really looking forward to going to prawn. I really missed it much.
But upon recieving one sms, my mood took the toll.
Yeahyeah, they eat. I dont eat. Told my maid not to cook for me. Why? Cos I wanted to go out with u all. Then? ....
And yep, wasn't long till tears welled up again. Fuck.
This time, I didn't bother to control it.
I don't want to listen to the small voice in my mind/heart anymore, that says: I must understand. I must understand. I must understand.
Because. I. Cant. Take. It. Anymore.
Labels: Breaking down
¶ 5:58 PM
